The inspiration behind A Few Wise Words
A challenging start in life and the origins of an inspiring book journey…
Anse Lazio Beach, Praslin Island, Seychelles 2012 - photo by author
I am often asked, “Where did the idea for A Few Wise Words first originate?”
It’s a simple question, but not so easy to answer in just a few words.
Three key things would inspire and shape my thinking and ultimately stimulate my later ambitions to create a book. One was a rather difficult period in my early life; the second was wanting to be the best father I could be for my young son; and the third was more of an epiphany.
My early years…
I grew up in a middle-class family in Finchley, London. My father had emigrated from India and trained as a dental surgeon in Scotland before moving south. My mother, from Germany, was a physiotherapist who met my dad while studying in Middlesex, England. I also had an amazing brother, Robin, who was just a year younger than me.
We lived in a house full of pets and rescued animals: lots of cats and dogs, various birds, rodents, and even a scary piranha fish called Dinsdale (I had to clean his tank).
It was a chaotic household but, I suppose, a relatively normal family existence, too.
Two brothers (me on the right) and our dog called Penny - taken a long time ago!
Early in my teenage years, I started to become curious about property design. Each morning, I would deliver newspapers near home and wash cars around Hampstead at the weekend, and I used to see lots of spectacular houses whose varied designs and characters evoked a deep fascination in me.
I remember my mother teasing me a few years ago about the times I persuaded her to go into London with me on the tube (subway) so that I could look at different buildings and even draw a few.
I would visit our local library in Finchley and read books on the great visionaries like Lutyens and Wren. We also had a neighbour who was an accomplished architect, and I loved talking with him too.
By the time I was fifteen, I had already developed a real passion for Architecture. I wanted to pursue it as a career and this was going to become my life. It was an exciting and happy time for me.
My teachers were aware of this, too, and guided me to choose my A-level exam subjects accordingly (technical drawing, design & technology, etc.) to enable me to meet the entrance requirements for the eight years of training that were required back then.
My father never really got involved with my schooling. He simply left everything for my mother to manage (he was busy running his dental practice and working all hours). But when she told him what I was intending to do, soon after I had selected my A-level subjects, he reacted badly.
I remember my initial confrontation with him on the matter. It was ugly.
I always had a lot of respect for my dad and would rarely argue with him, but this was hugely important for me, and I stood firm. I still recall him losing his temper at one point and yelling, “No son of mine is going to become a bloody architect! You are going to follow the family tradition and study Medicine!”
The arguments went on for weeks... I was deeply upset, but I wasn’t going to give in. It was my life, and this was what I wanted to do. No one would persuade me otherwise, not even my father.
One Monday morning, I attended my local Grammar school as usual. When my form teacher saw me walking into class, she said, “Peter, go now and see the Headmaster in his office, please. He’s expecting you”.
I was immediately terrified (having already been caned twice in the past after various schoolboy misdemeanours!) and thought, ‘What the hell have I done now?’ I nervously and slowly climbed the long stairwell up to see him.
My Headmaster was a very serious and intimidating man. Students and teachers alike all feared him.
As soon as he began speaking to me, I realised that my father had been in to see him the week before. Within a few minutes, he made it crystal clear to me that my A-level choices had now been changed to Biology, Physics and Chemistry, the subjects required for Medicine. The decision was irrevocable, and there was simply no argument.
Sadly, this whole event would become the prelude to a pretty unhappy period of my young life. I no longer enjoyed school and lost interest in my studies. I also became quite withdrawn. My dreams and my passion had been broken.
Ultimately, the most ridiculous thing was that I would end up neither studying Architecture nor Medicine. I simply rebelled.
Today, I have many friends and relatives who are medical professionals. But while I both admire and respect what they do immensely, Medicine was not something that I ever wanted to do as a career.
I started a business studies degree (I couldn’t think of anything else to do) but didn’t even complete it. I was still troubled, and abandoning my studies became another way for me to rebel at that time. It seems quite immature now, but my outlook was very different then.
I soon entered what I still refer to as ‘my wilderness years’. I would amble around without any direction, purpose or knowing what I really wanted to do for ages. Eventually, but many years later, I started to find my feet as I developed an aptitude for selling, which would lead me naturally towards the various things I have done since.
It is perhaps quite poignant that decades later, once I developed a love for photography, I became a respected architectural photographer specialising in high-end properties and interiors.
I still love Architecture to this day and truly believe that I would have made a great architect. But hey! Life moves on, and we eventually find new paths and fresh adventures. Hindsight is also totally pointless.
English country house shot with a 50ft mast - photo by author
Ever since that time, I have felt very strongly about the importance of passion. And when a young person (or anyone of any age, for that matter) develops a passion for something, this is an incredibly precious and important thing to have. It needs to be encouraged and nurtured, not discouraged or even destroyed. My desire to convey this would eventually become a key driver behind creating A Few Wise Words.
I also became acutely aware of the importance of building momentum when we are young and making the most of our early careers. The degree to which we invest in it and prepare ourselves fundamentally will naturally determine our future success.
I have to say too, that I realise now, years later, that my father simply didn’t understand what he was doing. He was from another era and a different cultural background, and he just wanted me to do what he believed was best for me. Although he was completely wrong, in my view, and we didn’t speak properly for several years after that time, I did eventually forgive him (he was my father, after all, and I knew that he loved me). We would enjoy a great friendship from then until he passed away, and I am still grateful for that today.
A few years ago, I spent time with Sir Clive Woodward, the legendary England rugby coach, who eventually became a contributor to A Few Wise Words (volume one). In his fascinating chapter, he describes a similar experience that he had with his father when he was young. It was interesting for me to learn how his own difficulties shaped his future and actually spurred him on to achieve an extraordinarily successful career. He eventually made up with his dad, too.
The role and actions of our parents can be hugely impactful on all of us when we are young. I will be covering my thoughts about this much more over the coming months in the Parenting section here in A Few Wise Words.
My epiphany
Fast-forward many years (decades even!), and after a thoroughly entertaining career journey through sales, consulting, business and lots of travelling, I would eventually find myself turning a new passion I had been nurturing for some time, photography, into a profession.
I had a young family by then, and we would always take long summer holidays and head off somewhere nice when my son broke up from school. I could also blend in a little photography while spending time relaxing and exploring with my family.
In 2012, I took them away to the Seychelles for a six-week tour. It was a magical time for us in a beautiful part of the world, and we spent the last two weeks on the idyllic island of La Digue. We stayed in a small villa by the beach, had baby giant tortoises roaming through our gardens and rented bicycles to get around; no cars, apart from taxis, were allowed on the island. It was a very relaxing place.
Early on, I hired a guide to help me explore some of the more remote parts of the island that I could photograph. On one occasion, he took me on a trek to find a small but stunning cove that was completely hidden away. I still remember its pristine beach speckled with beautiful washed-up sea shells of all sizes and types. It was a truly magical place surrounded by palm trees and totally secluded. But it was also very hard to get to, requiring us to scale several steep granite boulders and negotiate some perilous drops.
Once I knew how to get there, I just couldn’t resist going back, and I did so over several mornings, leaving well before dawn while my family were still asleep.
I would then spend two or three delightful hours just sitting on top of a large, flat granite rock that overlooked the beach. I used the time to meditate, talk to myself, and think deeply about things. This wonderful place felt like a mini-sanctuary for me, a remote spot where I could be by myself for a short while and indulge in a bit of introspection while enjoying a piece of nature at its most beautiful.
Among the more important things I thought about then was being a father to my wonderful son, Sebastian, who was only seven years old at the time. Like any dad, I just wanted to be the best father I could possibly be for him.
Sebastian while beach-combing on Praslin Island, Seychelles 2012 - photo by author
I had recently read Sir Richard Branson’s autobiography, ‘Losing my Virginity’. It was a great book and very inspiring, and while I was sitting on that rock one morning, a curious thought went through my head…
Wouldn’t it be amazing if I could, at some time in the future, arrange for Sebastian to spend a few hours with someone like Sir Richard? What an incredibly valuable experience that might be for him to help with his (eventual) career journey. I was imagining Seb sitting quietly with him, asking questions and listening to his advice.
It was an intriguing idea, and while it was circling around in my head, I also pondered: At what stage would this benefit Sebastian the most? Before he starts his secondary school? At the start of his career? Or perhaps later on in his career? Naturally, the older he is, the more he will be able to absorb, but receiving advice when much younger could also be very helpful. Meeting with him regularly at each key stage of his journey would, of course, be ideal!
I was soon dreaming about Sebastian spending time with lots of other incredible people as well, from Olympic gold medallists to A-List performing artists.
But although these were entertaining ideas to have, my thinking soon came back down to earth. To realistically expect any ultra-high-profile individual to be willing to dedicate so many hours, perhaps over several years, to essentially mentor someone that they had no connection with was always going to be a huge ask!
While I was gradually letting my fanciful thoughts drift away, I then had an epiphany…
Perhaps some of these amazing people would be willing to dedicate some time if their knowledge could be shared much more widely and far beyond impacting just one young person. What if I could gather from them their inspiring success stories, the knowledge they have gained and the advice they would give, and put this together in a book? Encouraging them to invest their time in something worthwhile like this might then not be such a big ask.
I could then meet with a wide range of luminaries from different walks of life and discuss what they believe someone should do at every stage of their career journey, from their schooling all the way until they are well into their careers.
In other words, a book like this might help anyone, at whatever point they may be on their career journey, to make the very most of the opportunities they have while managing the challenges they will face. It was a tantalising idea.
Fortunately, I had a great network, and I knew lots of highly connected people already, so perhaps it wouldn’t be too difficult for me to reach out to a whole range of extraordinarily successful individuals.
But a few years would pass before I had time once again to revisit the idea properly. One day, Bob, a good friend of mine and a successful businessman invited me out to lunch. I remember him asking me at one point, “I know you are busy with your photography, but what else have you got up your sleeve that you might like to do one day?” I then described for him the ‘book idea’ that I had.
I can still recall his expression as he looked at me with astonishment and said, “Peter! You absolutely have got to do this, mate!”
Bob would then introduce me to Laura, who became another good friend and was very helpful in the early stages of putting everything together. She, in turn, introduced me to Lord Mervyn Davies, the highly respected banker, ex-government minister and businessman.
He immediately visualised the impact that a book like this could have. I remember him saying, “I would love to help you build this, Peter”. He would eventually partner with me on the project.
Wind forward again, another four years later and after an enormous amount of work and dedication, A Few Wise Words (volume one) was eventually published in November 2020.
In the end, the book evolved into a compilation of 22 extraordinary individuals, each sharing (in their own words) their stories of success, their wisdom and most valuable advice to help anyone with ambitions to truly excel in life.
You can find out a little more about the book and its contributors here.
You can also find out a bit more about the project and me here.
So, that’s it! This is my story on how A Few Wise Words was born.
Today, I am still enjoying a wonderful journey, meeting and talking in depth with some of the world’s most respected and highly successful individuals across the globe.
We are currently working on Volume Two, and I will continue to share right here, in the A Few Wise Words Substack, the knowledge and wisdom that I am gathering from many extraordinary individuals as my journey to learn from their experiences and wisdom continues…
Thank you for your interest. If you would like to subscribe to the A Few Wise Words newsletter, I look forward to welcoming you.